I’ve been coaching for two decades. During my 20 plus years in executive search, a significant portion of each engagement involved coaching–both clients and candidates. My career path formed as a search executive, but leadership assessment and development were always of interest–and coaching meshed into each assignment. Whether I actively sought it out. Or not.

Whenever a friend, or mentor, proposed that I consider formal training to become a leadership coach–I’d balk and make excuses. Probably because that’s not how I viewed myself. At least then. But as I reflect upon the past decade the notion of formalizing training and certification to become a coach kept crossing my path. Inviting me. Enticing me. Momentary and stealth.  

Successful and satisfied as a leader within the executive search arena, I embarked on my own voyage of personal growth…whatever that means. What does it mean ? A great question as all answers are subjective. To me, it meant doing the work to become the best version of myself. Becoming aware of what was holding me back personally, and professionally, and then instituting changes where and when, it felt right.

I was seeking my “Why”, but I didn’t yet know it.

If this all feels a bit navel gazing, let me be clear. There wasn’t an ashram in sight and meditation remains a work in progress. As much as I love it and reap the benefits when I’m committed, I do struggle to quieten my mind. Always have. However, evoking transformation is an odd thing. Resonance creeps up when you least expect it. Mine started 11 years ago. A series of seemingly random and surprising events caused me to rethink how I wanted to spend the rest of my professional life and find my purpose.

Surprise #2
British people have a well-earned reputation for being stoic. It’s truly about the stiff upper lip. That, compounded with being a card-carrying member of Generation X, forced me to bootstrap, be independent from an early age and develop a wall of emotional strength. By now, you can probably guess what’s coming. During my “kicking and screaming” journey to become a coach, I stumbled across a TED Talk. Now infamous, it was much less so then. “The Power of Vulnerability” by Dr. Brene Brown literally changed my life. It changed how I viewed vulnerability. It changed how I live my life. It changed how I love and challenged my values. Last time I checked; it had been viewed over 50M times. Me and millions of others around the world embracing vulnerability–which by the way, does not mean weakness. Thank you, Brene Brown, Researcher and Storyteller.

Surprise #3  
A “chatterbox” is how my teachers always described me at Parent/Teacher evenings. I love to talk. Always have. Probably always will. Equally as important, I’m told I’m a good listener and I’d like to believe that to be true, especially as the skill of listening is a cornerstone of being a good search executive and coach.

We are still in 2010 and a BBC documentary series I stumbled across one gloomy Friday evening. “The Big Silence” follows six individuals of diverse backgrounds as they embark on an eight-day silent retreat at a Jesuit Monastery in Wales. The series follows them, through extreme difficulty, as they confront themselves and their lives. St. Beano’s Spirituality Center is astonishingly beautiful. Austere spires of grey set against the dramatic backdrop of mountainous Snowdonia, it’s the perfect place to visit, explore and think.

After watching the series I was sold. I signed up and headed off to St. Beuno’s. Knowing how absolutely hilarious my family would find the idea of me, the chatterbox going into silence, I tried to keep it under wraps. I was nervous. No phones. No TV. No music. No radio. Nothing. Just me in silence and my advisor with whom I was permitted to speak for 30 minutes a day. Fortunately, their library is heaving with books–so I lost myself in reading, winter walks and lots of contemplation.

I was alone with my thoughts. No distractions or outside influences, I was forced to sit with myself. It was intense and powerful. But it was also painful and revealing.

As I drove home, I knew that I would have to dig deep to find the courage to make some difficult life choices. So, I did.

Annette thriving in the wilderness.

Annette learning to practice vulnerability.   

Annette going into silence.

Three life changing events that started in 2010 that brought me here.

I realize that I’ve always been a coach. I’m the eldest child. I’m an only daughter. And I’ve been professionally coaching for many years. I just didn’t know it. I’m so happy that at long last–the idea of coaching is front and center for many organizations. I’m thrilled that individuals now proactively seek out coaches to help them carve out their path. I’m delighted of the newfound respect for the power of coaching and how transformational it can be…if you allow it. I’m also honored to be working with clients who are willing to invite me into their lives and help guide them as they embark on their next chapter. I know the challenges, I’ve lived them, too.

I acknowledge that I won’t be the best coaching fit for everyone and I’m absolutely fine with that.  My specialty is working with senior level executives and high potentials who choose to model their best version of leadership–that’s leading within their value system, with empathy and who build organizational cultures that support psychological safety and permit imperfection.

But leaders are people and values are holistic–irrespective of whether you consider them to be personally or professionally driven. How you, as a leader choose to show up, day after day and through adversity (something we now know all too much about, given the events of 2020) is how you will be remembered. That is your legacy.

I’m still working on mine.